It's been a really long time since I've written anything and I truly miss it. I'm always thinking about 257 different things and writing helps me focus and organize my thoughts for longer than 30 seconds at a time...
I've felt overwhelmed with everything going on in the world lately. There is so much pain and suffering. There are so many truly awful things going on. The bad thing about all this technology that we have access to and being so connected is that we constantly see everything - the good, the bad, and the ugly. And I would say that more often than not we focus on the bad and the ugly because somehow we get some sick pleasure out of feeding on the negative things. I'm not saying that we support or condone the things going on, I only mean that we as a society seem to perseverate on the negative. In no way am I discounting the tragedies that have occurred recently. My heart truly does break hearing about all of the innocent people killed in terror attacks by individuals who hate differing viewpoints and freedom.
My heart breaks because online we can all be anyone we want and we engage in shouting matches over comments to prove that we're right. I don't mind debate and differing viewpoints. But when did it become acceptable to name call and be completely rude to other people? I doubt that many of us would say these things if we were actually sitting down and having a conversation face-to-face with one another.
Because I am conservative, I'm (sadly) used to being called an idiot, bigot, hate-filled Christian, etc. There is a longer list, I'm sure, but why am I not allowed to have and voice my opinion? Why is my opinion something to be terrified of?
Perhaps the thing that really put me over the edge this week was that people were mocking prayer after the San Bernardino terror attack. Why was it okay to #PrayforParis, but completely unacceptable to pray for our fellow Americans? I saw people mocking that God clearly wasn't listening because if He was, this wouldn't still be happening. I saw others say that those offering prayers were sick individuals because how could they look at the families of the victims and say that prayer works? I saw other posts about how Christians were hateful because how could they look at the families of the victims and say "sorry, guess you didn't pray enough!" There were other posts about how God is supposed to be loving, so why doesn't He love these people?!
It is hard to understand why someone would pray until you have been touched by the love of Christ. Many non-believers rejoice when Christians mess up or sin, but the reality is, we Christians aren't perfect. Not even close. I mess up. I still sin. Jesus Christ is still working on me and I will never be perfect. I'm not striving to be "perfect." I'm striving to be more like Christ each and every day.
We live in a fallen world. It is easy for me to worry and fear the world with all of the terrible things happening. But...I have to look to God. Because He is my hope, strength, and my salvation. And I know that this world is not my home.
I wish that horrible things didn't happen. I wish that people didn't hate each other.
I keep going back to "Even When it Hurts" by Hillsong United. The following lyrics have stuck with me over the last couple of weeks:
Even when the fight seems lost, I'll praise You.
Even when it hurts like hell, I'll praise You.
Even when it makes no sense to sing
Louder then I'll sing Your praise
I think these lyrics are profound. Life sometimes hurts like hell and I often look at the state of the world and it feels like the fight is lost!
I wish that there would be no more pain and suffering. I don't want to see anymore people hurt.
We have a sin problem. I have to keep looking up. I have to keep praising God. I know how the story ends. I know Jesus Christ is coming back to make all things right.
Even When it Hurts - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Sv_876eqxg
